In my last post, I briefly mentioned the definition of BDSM. To recap, BDSM stands for bondage and discipline, domination and submission, sadism and masochism. This has become a hot topic due to the success of the Fifty Shades of Grey series. You may have been taught that your kinks and fetishes are something to be ashamed of but they are not. Embrace them in a safe and fun environment. Sex can be a wonderful part of a relationship. Research Don’t be afraid to start Googling. Just make sure you have the tab open in incognito mode first. Don’t take your information from movies or porn websites as those can portray kinks and how to go about them incorrectly. If you’re interested in buying some gear make sure you purchase the correct equipment. Keep in mind what materials may leave behind bruises, rashes, or scars. Metal handcuffs can be rough. For beginner’s, leather or lined cuffs may be more suitable. Buy ropes that are specially prepared and soft so as not to leave burns. Don’t be afraid to head to your local sex shop and ask questions. That’s what they are there for. Communication Trust and communication are the pinnacle of any sexual relationship. It is especially important when it comes to trying out new things. You must be open with each other. Don’t let social stigma hold you back. Talk about any dreams you’ve had or fantasies you want to play out. Let your partner explain their fantasies too. Find out what each other’s limits are. Create a safe word to let each other know if anything is going wrong during sex. The two C’s you and your partner should always remember are consent and communication. Take Small Steps Don’t dive straight into the deep end when pursuing a BDSM relationship for the first time. Take small steps into the shallow end. Feel out the water. See what it’s like. Start with spanking or handcuffs if your partner agrees to those activities. Consent is important. Also, make sure to do your research. Do you want to explore more or have you had enough? If you discover it’s not your kink don’t be afraid to stop and pursue another type of fetish. Photo-credit to their respective artists.
© Katerina Fiedler. All Rights Reserved.
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Katerina’s Kinks looks at the taboo nature of BDSM, sex, love, and relationships. With the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy’s rising popularity and the heated discussion about the series, let me introduce you to the scene and guide you through the this new world. ArchivesCategories |